Baby Hamkauf

7 Months of Dumpling!

2012-01-10T16:48:00.000-08:00

I am at a coffee shop in Beloit, missing Brynn and Hattie, who will return from San Francisco in a few days. But Hattie has passed the 7 month milestone (this was achieved my mixing mashed prunes into her limited diet), and deserves a picture-filled post. I left San Francisco early to lead a workshop at Science North in Sudbury, Ontario. I had a good time in the town famous for nickel-mining and asteroid impact, seeing my only real snow of the holiday season. Our semester starts back up at Beloit in a few days, and I am putting the final touches on my syllabi and preparing for auditions and rehearsals for "Pretty Theft," which starts up the first week of classes.

I had a great time in San Francisco with the Hambly's and Hattie, which I'll chronicle through the Picture Pages!

Not crawling yet, but able to get where she needs to go, and still has the gumption to look like

a slightly displeased Mafia boss.

This Mob boss tuckers her parents OUT.

Hattie at Half Moon Bay.

Hattie showing off the name tag she got at her free trial Gymboree class. I thought it was nice, Brynn was underwhelmed, and Hattie was able to hang with the other "level 2" students, particularly outshining "Ian" who seemed to cry at the least bit of clapping, hearing familiar melodies with cleverly branded lyrics (who knew "Gymboree" had the exact same number of syllables and opening "Juh" sound as the holiday favorite "Jingle Bells?!"), and sitting under a waving parachute. I also realize that I'm not doing Hattie any favors by making goofy faces and squirming playfully when she pulls my hair. Why, then, don't the other kids like it? Why don't they jig and amble as does Daddy? Why is Ian crying again?

This is the sad result of a diaper changed in the tailgate of a car,
while Hattie clings to and swings about her favorite bunny. And her stuffed rabbit.

Hattie got a part time job at the front desk of an accountant's office. She wore business casual and directed people to eat a magazine while they wait.

Actually, Hattie is in what I called "the machine" that Vicky found for us (a GREAT thing that we'll have to get when they return to Beloit). It's like a workstation with gizmos on all sides. When I called it "The Machine," Brynn assumed I was referencing the hugging machine that Temple Grandin invented to give herself (and later livestock) a sense of security. That wasn't my intention, and I worried why Brynn would make this connection.

Speaking of livestock! Hattie, Brynn and Vicky went to Riley's Place, where Vicky volunteers.

I think Hattie's telling this pony about her machine!

Happy New Year to you all. Hattie says she hopes 2012 will finally "put the birth behind her."

Hattie Claus!

2011-12-27T12:22:00.000-08:00

It's the holiday time of year! Hattie is "a little duck" according to Brynn, who is sitting across the counter from me with Hattie on her lap. Hattie got a B+ from Brynn this morning for her sleep grade, which is pretty good. In the past week, Hattie has driven to Iowa to spend pre-Christmas with my family, then got on a plane to San Francisco in time for the Hambly Christmas Eve party. I assured the man sitting next to us on the plane that Hattie was usually pretty well behaved on planes. Instead of being relieved, he said, "oh, great. Way to jinx it." I said, "I didn't mean to jinx it. She's just flown before and has done well."
"You just did it again," he said, chuckling, as if he'd "caught me in the act."
"So according to your logic, if I wish you a Merry Christmas, you'll have a crappy Christmas, because I'd have 'jinxed' it, huh?"
"Oh, now..."
"Because I have some sort of 'super power' where if I say something, the opposite thing happens? Okay, then our beautiful, cherubic daughter is going to wail, vomit and poop nonstop during this flight, and you'll have a holly jolly Christmas, my dear American Airlines Row-Mate."

But she really was good on the plane, and we're having a great time in California with Brynn's family. She got her first dolly, which she loves.

She also visited Riley's Place, where she got to pet goats and see horses

She has also been eating banana Mush

Our child loves polka-dots!

Decked out for the Christmas Eve party

Holiday Cheer

An outfit adorned exclusively with sweets we hope she doesn't actually ingest for many years

Hattie rhymes with Dattie!

Wood Blocks from Uncle Will!

Merry Christmas, to all Hattie's friends!

6 Months of Hattie!

2011-12-05T19:57:00.000-08:00

Today is Hattie's 6 month birthday. It was June 5th that Hattie emerged proudly from a hospital room above Kinnick Stadium in Iowa City. Now she prepares for the brisk Beloit winter. She's in a little carrier on me right now, and starting to squirm, so I'll...

Okay, It's later now. Brynn got home from volunteering at the literacy center and we all ate a special birthday meal that Hattie and I had prepared: Trader Joes crab cakes, roasted vegetables and apple pie. The pie was "baked in a bag."

The pie came from the Elegant Farmer.

Please do now go to the website:

http://www.elegantfarmer.com/

If you click on "Farmer Dan's Messages," you'll hear an inspirational message.

The pies were being sold at Williams Tree Farm, where we had a family outing yesterday, complete with lots of dogs, reindeer, and Santa.

And this just in: Hattie's first tooth.

Also, she now has a crib, thanks to my Dad and Linda.

We had a nice Thanksgiving with James, Rebecca and Samuel.

Now we're just trying to keep things together until Christmas, when we can hand Hattie off to Grandparents, siblings and random salvation army bell-ringers

and run off to the Muppet Movie.

Picture time, yo.

Insert cliche dual usage of "crib"joke here.

Whatever you feel about patriarchal representations of monotheism,

this is like an effing Norman Rockwell.

Featuring Rumpus as both the lamb of God

AND the star of Bethlehem!

Warming up after picking out our tree

I can't abide this gul durn city life. I'm gonna go outside and russell up some CUTE.

Rumpus has a breaking point. And Hattie will find it.

She believes it is somewhere near his shaggy poodle ear.

Here Hattie gives the illusion of being able to sit up by herself.

Left alone, she would continue her right-leaning trajectory.

Hattie's first words were "I got them Duke boys right where I want them!"

It's so cold we replaced her nose with a funny green mustache!

If eyes could say "Help Me," her eyes would be saying "Help Me."

Since they cannot say such things at such a young age, let us make believe that they are saying

"Until next time, my friends. Goodest of byes. I shall miss you.

But seriously. Help me."

Pre-Turkey Hattie

2011-11-22T21:21:00.000-08:00

Hattie seems like she's developing a sense of humor. She loves to look at herself in the mirror, while Brynn and I sing the "Hattie's in the Mirror" song. She smiles and then she leans in and starts to slobbery make out with herself. She's also quite a roller and can inch-worm her way around the room. She's also making new noises and squeals that drive Rumpus bonkers. He shakes in fear and leaves the room. We got a new rug for her, because the old one was kind of grody, but she just rolls off of it in no time. We've started the cloth diaper service and I changed my first poopy cloth diaper today. It's getting colder but Brynn bundles her up for walks. She grabs things much more specifically now.

We went to Babies R Us and got some "child proofing" products. That place is gross, though. I don't know why. It just is.

"The Dining Room" closed last weekend after a nice run. Those Beloit students are good people and they did a great job. I also gave blood for the first time last week. I'd been scared of needles in the past, but I decided I should just do it. Our friends James and Rebecca are coming to visit us for Thanksgiving and arrive tomorrow with their son, Sam. When I called James to tell him that Brynn was pregnant, he told me that Rebecca was, too. So we're excited for Sam and Hattie to finally meet!

Picture Time!

The post-bath reach-down!

Bundling up for the cold weather

This is a new rug we got, where Hattie spends much time with her toys. She really does entertain herself much better these days.

I was leaving and this was the mother-daughter connection I saw when I came in to say goodbye. Cheek to forrid.

Another common sight: Brynn ready to catch a few more Z's and Hattie ready to Par-tay.

See why we need to child-proof the house?

SHE'S WITH HER DOGGY FRIENDS HERE!

She looks so mature in her high chair-thing.

Today Hattie just started drumming away with her rattle and a bowl. It was like the beginning of a Tom Waits song.

Golden Month Birthday!

2011-11-05T21:33:00.000-07:00

Today is Hattie's 5 month birthday on the 5th!
And tonight it's the day where you set your clocks back! For us grown ups, that's an extra hour of sleep. I don't think Hattie will care, though. She'll just sleep, and wake up, with infant-regularity, like she always does. But her mom will THINK she's going to get an extra hour of sleep, but she won't really.

Brynn and Hattie are in San Francisco, visiting her Nana and PaTapaNatupa (as we are gently encouraging Hattie to call her maternal grandfather). They are visiting until "The Dining Room" opens in Beloit, since I'm not able to be as helpful of a parent as I'd like to be. So Brynn and Hattie live the high life on the West Coast and I take care of Rumpus in Beloit, Wisconsin. I heard there was a small earthquake there, today, though. If they felt it, it would be Hattie's first. I should ask them. I should at least make sure my daughter is all right. I read it on "Google News" while I was walking Rumpus, but then I forgot all about it. For Hattie, it would be a BirthQuake!

I have video chats with them, and she's changing so much. She's close to crawling, she's really mastering drooling, and I think she's close to making that initial "unlock" swipe on the iphone.

Picture time!

She loves her tub time. You can tell she's smiling, even though her mouth is covered.

That's because she's smiling WITH HER EYES!

Still adorable, cheek to cheek with Brynn, but it's one of those pictures where she looks like she's a different nationality. Russian? Chinese? I was missing Hattie today, and I was driving, and there was a car with one of those "I love my Pekinese" with a little dog silhouette, and I fantasized that I had a similar sticker, with a silhouette of little Hattie that said "I love my Caucasian" but then I thought it might seem in poor taste.

It's like she's having a picnic. A BABY picnic!

She's looking upward and to her left in this digital photograph.

Brynn's mom, Vicky, took this one (I think she took most of these!), but get rid of the furniture legs in the background, and it looks like a professional photo shoot!

You always have to have one clunker, so people know you have perspective, you don't just think your child is always beautiful and perfect.

People ask about Hattie's Halloween Costume, and these are some of her ideas.

The text on the shirt says "My First Halloween" I believe. We allowed her to wear it, but emphasized that this was not and never will be a substitute for an actual costume.

Learning piano with her Uncle Will.

Some bad guys were trying to get into the room, so we used the Pack N Play to block the door. Pack N STAY. OUT! Badguys!

That seat binds the thighs so it gives the illusion that the child can sit up before she really can. Note the keys in her left hand. TO MY HEART!

Hattie with her Grandparents

Happy Birthday, Mush Mush!

Four Months

2011-10-09T09:03:00.000-07:00

This past Wednesday Hattie celebrated her four month birthday. She didn't really celebrate, but she was in good spirits. She is rolling over more, making new sounds, and relaxing on her back, holding her feet in the "Happy Baby" pose. We've been going for runs in her fancy jogging stroller by the river. She is starting to teethe, we think. Putting objects and tabletops in her mouth. Drooling. She's a pretty consistent one-poop-a-day girl these days. We've stopped swaddling her at night because she so darn strong that she just wriggles out of it. I was worried, because the swaddle was like an "off switch" if she was fussy before bed, but she's been swaddle-free for 3-4 days now and sleeping about the same as before. She usually goes to bed around 10, wakes at 2, and then again at 5, and then around 7 for the morning. Hmm. Seeing it written out, it's kind of a 4,3,2 sequence. Maybe we should work harder to squeeze an extra hour out of her from 7-8... After that, we'd get diminishing returns if we tried to follow the pattern.

Our friend Kizzy has been visiting from Iowa City for the past few days, and it's always great to have visitors (who come and HOLD THE BABY). They like it. We like it. Holding the baby is a nice thing for people we like to do.

Recent Pictures:

Rumpie! No licking the baby!

Friends at an appropriate distance

Taking advantage of the more liberal Southern Wisconsin sunbathing culture

Seconds after her right sock was abducted by aliens.

The craft was still hovering 6 feet above her when we took this picture.

She's just like people!

Tummy Time!

The Li'l Hawkeye, hoping "her boys" could come back against Penn State

She's always in a good mood in the morning.

This picture captures why her nickname is "Mushy."

Enjoying the beautiful weather we've been having

Vintage Hattie West

Hattie Faces Her First Fall

2011-09-21T19:55:00.000-07:00

Hattie is going nuts in her swing right now, gurgling away.

She has two new tricks: Hair pulling and rolling over.

Here is evidence of the first:

And in case you think that was a "staged" picture of a "cute" baby pulling hair, be confronted with this video!

She has also gotten pretty tough. Here's her as a mafioso explaining what will happen if she doesn't get her milk when she demands it:

And here she is tormenting a friend with a no-look roundhouse, followed by her first complete sentence: "that's just to keep you in line."

That friend is actually Svea, born on the exact same day as Hattie, just half an hour apart. Brynn takes Hattie for walks most days with Svea and her dad, Steffen. Steffen is German, and likes Aldi's food store. Brynn went and was confused because some woman gave Brynn her cart. Brynn said "thanks," but the woman kept looking at her. "Yes?" Brynn asked. "The money." The woman said. Brynn didn't realize that you have to pay a quarter to use the carts. Rather, Brynn was like "freak alert!" Then Brynn went inside and everything was in boxes instead of handsomely displayed on shelves. This passes savings on to the customer, but Aldi's was not for Brynn.

Hattie did get a new jogging stroller which is great. There are lots of squirrels here in Beloit. The squirrels drop nuts on the sidewalks. Our little stroller hits these nuts and just about capsizes. NOT THE MIGHTY KNOBBY-WHEELED JOGGING STOLLER! And Brynn doesn't have to put up with Steffen bragging about "superior German engineering" any longer.

This is likely my last update of the summer. But Hattie, like the Great Rotund Pumpkin she has become, will be back in the fall!

3 Months of Hattie

2011-09-05T20:34:00.000-07:00

Hattie was born almost exactly 3 months ago as I write this. She had a great bath tonight with Brynn to recreate a little mother/daughter womby bonding. People have told us "oh, you'll get to know what each cry means" and I thought they were just being pretentious, but it's true! She's got a cry/scream that is definitely not "I'm hungry." It's 10 times as loud and it's "I'm in pain," which really means, "I have gas" or "I have a big burp." She'll have to get over that one before she enters the dating scene! And I swear she had an entire conversation with Brynn's nipple this morning, changing facial expressions and cooing (the nipple was remarkably stone faced). Well, here are some pictures, all of which were taken today, as she sails past what some hipsters call "the fourth trimester." We love you, Mushy Girl!

Wisconsin Cheese Hat

2011-08-30T20:14:00.000-07:00

It's been quite a journey getting to Beloit and settling in. Our internet was just hooked up today, and the blogosphere is overdue for a Hattie update. Since her birthday almost 3 months ago, Hattie has been to Chicago, Los Altos, Brackney, back to Chicago, Iowa City and now Beloit, Wisconsin. Along the way she's doubled in size. She had her last Iowa City checkup a few days ago, and she was fit and healthy, at 13 and 1/2 pounds. She has some serious thigh-rolls that are cute until you have to flatten them out to clean the poop out of them. We tend to put her under the kitchen sprayer after every BM. It's the baby bidet.

She enjoyed being back at her birth-hospital, if only for a day. She even makes sounds when she's content that sound like "Iiiioooowwaaa..." She got all her shots, but she wasn't happy about it. This is a typical Hattie "You're going to pay for this when I'm a teenager" look (note the band-aids. Oh, yeah--and now that I see the picture, you can note the thigh-rolls, too!).

I mean, compare her to the skinny chuck that came out of Brynn not 3 months ago. We were always afraid she would break. Slow hands through the arm holes so the fingers don't snap off. But now, she's durable goods. "Built like a thumb" as my dad would say. Half her clothes don't fit her anymore.

Her Nana Vicky came from California and helped take care of Hattie as we got settled in our new place. Hattie is laughing and smiling (and frowning and crying 2 seconds later). She's sleeping longer at night, sometimes a 4 hour stretch before her first wake-up. Brynn is doing well, although now that Vicky's gone and I've started teaching, it's hard for her to be in a new place where she doesn't know people. I did meet a colleague that has a baby girl, with the exact same birthday, so we're going to get together with them.

I had my first day of teaching at Beloit College today, and it was quite a thrill. Yesterday there was the 165th Year Convocation and all the faculty donned robes and walked across campus in a procession. Students lined up along the route and applauded as we passed. Some more enthusiastically than others, but it still felt good.

And now, some more pictures!

Loves being wrapped up with her mom

Taking charge of her bottle at Bushel and Peck in Beloit

Hanging on the couch with her old pal Rumpus, looking amazingly bald, for some reason.

I'm not sure "Li'l" is the right adjective for this burgeoning tyke.

But she's ready for kickoff!

Back at Brackney

2011-07-28T15:47:00.000-07:00

I was at a conference in Chicago and was away from Hattie for almost a week. It was hard to be away, but amazing to see how fast she changes. I remember when we worried about driving with her, and had somebody sit in the back seat with her so her head didn't loll and stay lolled. Now she can keep her head up. She seems to realize that her arms are extensions of her torso, rather than the "startling random flailers" of younger days. She smiles more, and will even respond to specific sounds, imitating oohs and aahs. Before I left she had two waking modes: "End of the World Crying" and "Nipple-in-Mouth Contentment," usually alternating between the two in a flash. Now she has some more subtle shades of contentment and discontent. She's also sleeping a little better in the night. I think it's because her stomach is bigger and she doesn't need to wake up as often to nurse. She did enter a phase of unbelievably stinky and juicy poo, but the pediatrician said it was common and shouldn't last for too long. Diaper changing has inspired the shorthand euphemism: "Check for mustard in the bun!" Our friend Allie is visiting from Seattle, and we are all relaxing at the cabin at Brackney.

Here are this week's pictures:

Bundled when Brackney gets chilly

Learning to cheer for local sports teams. Also, notice the weight gain. She's closing in on 10 pounds! Freaking Champ!

No more lolling head!

She loves her Hattie-Rattle!

"what the shmootie you talkin' 'bout?!"

Hattie at Six Weeks

2011-07-17T21:03:00.000-07:00

As I write this, it is 10:46 PM Iowa City Time, which makes Hattie exactly 6 weeks old. She just got a bath, and is doing well. She's been smiling more and more. But the next second she might frown or look puzzled, or make her "oh!" (pooping) face. So I don't know what she's smiling about. I do like that her many facial expressions seem so genuine. There is very little filter between the impulse and the expression. They just come across her face as she feels them. Smiling might mean an end to that, though, since she gets such a HUGE response when she does it. She'll figure that out pretty quick. I think it's the first step on the road to intentional manipulation of others. We still love her, but she can no longer be completely trusted. She is no longer without guile, one might say. But we'll honor these early, innocent smiles with some pictures.

Our friends Connie and Rob visited us today with their 1 year old, and I couldn't believe that Hattie would ever get to be that big so soon. Yikes!

Brynn and Vicky took Hattie out a few days ago, and got a picture of the diaper change tailgate party:

And one more of Hattie in swaddled bliss:

Hattie at 5 Weeks

2011-07-12T17:23:00.000-07:00

We are having a great time at the cabin in the Santa Cruz mountains. Hattie hit 5 weeks old on Sunday. She is settling in to the rustic life here. Yesterday we went for a walk in at Henry Cowell park, surrounded by giant redwoods. Rumpus got tired, so on the way back he rode in the stroller and we carried Hattie.

We decided that there should be an "It Gets Better" campaign for new parents. A series of video testimonials from parents who have survived the early weeks and months of parenting and have lived to see their children sleeping during most of the night and actually doing things during the day. Beyond peeing, pooping and feeding, that is.

It's hard to notice day by day, but Hattie really is growing and changing. She definitely weighs more, and she's even getting too big for several of her early outfits. We think she's about 8 pounds now, but we won't have a new "official" weight for a few more weeks. She looks less like a little monkey and more like a little person. Sometimes that little person is a cranky-faced old man.

Compare the following pictures: Hattie a month ago vs. Hattie now. In the picture on the left you see a little baby, thinking only of suckling milk and shortly thereafter sending that milk out her other end. In the picture on the right you see a vibrant young woman, thinking only of suckling milk and shortly thereafter sending that milk out her other end. Okay, that's still the same... But the hat on the LEFT is PINK, and the hat on the RIGHT is STRIPED and BLUE!

NOTE: Despite her name, Hattie does not seem to like hats much at all. At least until her head gets bigger. They fall over her eyes, and this vexes her to no end. But it's chilly here at night, so hats she must wear!

Below are a few more pictures that I'd wanted to post, but now are a few weeks old.

Hattie with her Grandfather, Harry.

Hattie with that Post-Bath Glow

I may have posted this one before, but it's one of my favorites of Hattie and Brynn

Diaper Changing Primer: Do it post-feeding, if possible. Pre-feeding she will cry throughout. Post feeding she is like changing the clothes of a friendly drunk. She's in another world, getting a kick out of the fact that somebody is contorting her body to wipe her bottom with a cool wet paper towel thing. Pre-feeding she treats it as a calculated torture to keep her from her one true desire. She kicks and wails. Wails can be translated as "Let me GO! Torturer! I shall not be denied my one true love! Is it tougher when I KICK!? Then KICK I shall! And as soon as the soiled garment is off, I'll PEE! Aaah! Ha! Now you must change my entire outfit! Which takes FOREVER! Curse you for this delay! In defiance I shall KICK my pink heel into the still-open diaper that you had not time to dispatch before my rebellious PEEING and subsequent outfit-changing! Ha, Villain! Now clean off my heel lest it get on my new onesie! Clean it whilst I WRIGGLE!"

OK, back to my tips!
-Change diaper post-feeding if possible. We seldom do this, however, since post-feeding is the most likely time for SLEEPING, and this is a sacred opportunity, not to be squandered! So, the following tips relate to pre-feeding diaper changing.
-Have the baby wipe out and the new diaper open and ready.
-Let the kicks work FOR you! Hold the pant leg at the bottom and wait. She will kick out of it. She will not be forced out of garments. In fact, say aloud "Please don't kick!" and she will immediately cock her leg back to kick! When she does, she pulls right out of the pant leg! You've won! This SAME TRICK will work on the other leg. RIGHT AFTER you tricked her on leg #1! And it will work for putting the pants back on! And it will work for the NEXT Diaper change, too! She is strong, but surprisingly easy to outwit at this age.
-It's satisfying to use one wipe per change, and it can be done. But better to use 2 if it means a faster change, and let's you put the dry diaper down sooner (catching the possible mid-change pee)
-Oh, yeah--that same trick that works with the legs works with the arms. They will straighten and retract into/out of garments if you use her own strength against her. It's the same theory behind many martial arts popular in Asian countries.
-Make sure the the folds don't get tucked in around the legs, or poop can escape like nobody's business.
-The one time we used some kind of diaper rash cream, her bottom got really red and irritated. Just natural wipes (not the perfumed ones!) and we're fine. I wish she could "air dry" longer/more often, but it's just too dangerous.

One Month of Hattie!

2011-07-05T14:14:00.000-07:00

Today is Hattie’s 1 month birthday. We are in San Francisco with Brynn’s parents, and she is happy to be here. It was quite an adventure getting here. On Friday our friend Kizzy drove Brynn, Hattie, Rumpus and I to Chicago to a hotel near O’hare. We stayed overnight and then all piled into a shuttle to the airport. We left ourselves plenty of time, but walking Rumpus, changing Hattie, checking in, going through security with a dog and all the baby paraphernalia took extra time. We got to the gate and discovered that Brynn and I weren’t sitting together. Luckily, they were able to fix that and we survived the flight with Rumpus under the seat and Hattie nursing on and off. It could have been so much worse!

We went to a BBQ and a wedding over the weekend, and now we’re able to relax a bit. Hattie spent some time playing with her new mobile.

I’ve found that I do all right when Hattie cries if I’m by myself or just with Brynn. Then, the baby cries for a little while, and then we deal with it. If there are other people around and she’s not crying, everybody thinks she’s so sweet. If she starts to cry, the judgments come out, and they judge ME, rather than the one they SHOULD be judging: the one who’s CRYING. They state the obvious (“She’s crying.” Or “Sounds like she’s upset.”) or offer advice (“Might be time to feed her.” Or “You should try bouncing her on one of those bouncing balls.”

So many people see the baby and say “she’s perfect.” At first this bothered me, because it felt like bad Karma. Nobody’s perfect, and we don’t expect our daughter to be. But I realized that people don’t mean that she really is perfect like that. They mean “unspoiled,” I think. Innocent. Nothing/nobody has corrupted her yet. But they would feel strange saying, “look at her! She is completely uncorrupted at this point in her life!” So they just say “She’s so perfect,” and I silently acknowledge that they are really saying, “Seeing her, I am reminded that life has bruised my spirit and corrupted my nature. I am stained.”

People also say “isn’t it just the most amazing thing?” or “Isn’t it a miracle?” And yes, it IS. But sometimes people ask this some morning after we’ve been up half the night, dealing with screaming and stinky and perfectly-timed peeing (right after the dirty diaper is removed and before the new one is in place) and at that particular moment, parenthood feels less like a miracle and more like a pain in the butt. But you can’t say that, or you break the unwritten rule of constant appreciation for all things newborn. In such cases, you always say, “Yes! It is a miracle! It is an amazing miracle!”

I haven’t updated the blog for a while because we discovered that some strangers were following the blog and it felt kind of creepy. I got Facebook messages from people in foreign countries that said things like. “Kaufmann John! Am hearing of your babygirl! And I congrats you!” It was a little unsettling. We considered making the blog private, and still may do that. But for the time being, if this blog gives inspiration to strangers, hopefully new-parents themselves, maybe that’s not the worst thing. We did resolve to stop posting half-naked pictures of daughter on-line the moment she graduates from high school.

Memories of Iowa City

2011-06-23T13:33:00.000-07:00

It has been nice to have this blog to share events surrounding the birth of our daughter, Hattie, for our family and friends. Brynn and I are involved with education and theatre. We studied theatre and education as graduate students at the University of Iowa. We believe in using theatre as a teaching tool and to make the world a better place. We are excited to move, but will miss our home and the people of Iowa City. We moved into our Iowa City house right after we got married. It was the first house we had ever owned and it was a house of love for us during our first years of marriage. It was such a great house and we have so many positive memories there. When we were having our anniversary dinner, we reminisced about each room and shared memories about each one. I hope the new owners continue to have a great experience in the house!

Fireballs and Breadsticks

2011-06-22T06:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Brynn and my 3rd wedding anniversary. We stayed at home with Hattie and ate some delicious Indian food that some friends had made for us and dropped off. It's been a busy week and I haven't updated the Baby Hamkauf blog.

Last week started off with FIREBALLS! We were sitting at home, packing boxes. I think at the moment we were putting some drops in Hattie's eyes, actually, and there was a loud explosion and a fireball out the window, not so far away. Then, a few minutes later, another one! My first thought was of the movie "Red Dawn." Also of this car that had driven past earlier that night when I was walking Rumpus. They'd driven TOO FAST down the street and yelled something. "Teenage Troublemakers!" I thought at the time. But after the fireballs, I thought maybe they were real enemies.

"Get Hattie and Rumpus downstairs!" I said. Brynn was freaking out, too, although I don't think she was aware of the movie "Red Dawn" with Patrick Swayze. (And perhaps a young C. Thomas Howell? [And yet, if he didn't really have any movies beyond his youth, need we specify a "young" C. Thomas Howell?]) I turned off the lights in the house so I could see OUT, but the bad guys couldn't see IN. Then... Another FIREBALL!

Brynn called up from the basement: "Johnny, that one was right outside the window! I don't feel safe down here!" I escorted Brynn, barefoot, and holding Rumpus in one arm and Hattie in the other, out through the backyard and onto the neighbor's back porch, where they were also puzzling over the commotion. Meanwhile, 2 firetrucks and 3 police cars were parked and spinning lights right in front of our house.

Neighbors and gawkers were walking about. I learned that it was a powerline that got hit by a tree branch which triggered a transformer to blow, which daisy chained down the line. No bad guys or C. Thomas Howells involved.

Over the next few days we had family in town helping us to pack up boxes and watch Hattie. Rumpus went to doggie day care one morning and returned to find an empty house. That must have been so unsettling for him! On father's day, I got up early and drove a 22 foot Penske truck to Beloit, unpacked it (with some "local muscle") and drove home. Meanwhile Brynn was cleaning and clearing the Iowa City house. That night we slept at our neighbors house.

Hattie is doing fine. She's swaddled next to me, the "sleep sheep" burbling in her ears, while Brynn gets her morning sleep. Sometimes her poop is green, sometimes it's yellow. But she only eats one thing. And I'm pretty sure it's always milky-colored. So go figure. Her belly button nub is close to coming off. The dr. said that it just "rots off." Any body part that "rots off" is bound to be stinky, and her belly button nub is stinky. I can't wait until it comes off!

June Joy

2011-06-13T16:47:00.000-07:00

Hattie had a great time at Banditos, her first restaurant, and then she saw her first play, a dress rehearsal for the Riverside Green Show. I had a great birthday with her, Brynn and the Hambly Grandparents!

She had a dr. appointment today, and she'd put on some of the weight she'd lost after birth, and she's doing well. Here is a video we made at the dr. office.

Swaddled and Swell

2011-06-12T07:05:00.000-07:00

Brynn is sleeping, and Hattie is swaddled and sleeping upstairs as I type. It's a colorful getup. Here's how she looks:

The sun is just up and I can see squirrels chasing each other around the tree in the front yard and bright red cardinals flying about. I've been up for a few hours packing boxes, getting ready for our summer of moving. I'm going to miss this house, this neighborhood, this city. It's my birthday today, and we're going to go to breakfast at Banditos after Brynn wakes up. Then I've got rehearsal and our first dress for the Ah, Wilderness Green Show. Hattie and the Hambly's are going to come, as Harry and Vicky leave tomorrow. We'll really miss having them around!

In many of these pictures, you can see Hattie swaddled up. Brynn and I are trying out the "cuddle cure" as described in a book and video that several people gave us and recommended. The system seems to work pretty well. If Hattie is fussy or crying, we check her diaper and/or feed her (she feeds like crazy. Her eyes get this fiendish look when she latches on to the breast. Every time I see it, I remember that the new season of True Blood came out on video last week). Then if she's fed, changed and still fussy, we Swaddle her (the 1st of the 5 S's!). Quite often it works, as it did this morning. That swaddled angel you see above was a squirmy devil moments before. Keys: swaddle nice and tight so the arms can't escape, and don't be deterred if the crying/wailing increases when the swaddling starts!

Another of the 5 S's we find helpful is sound/Shushing (loud Shushing!). Like the swaddling, it recreates the sense of the womb (so they say). We're also trying to think of these 1st three months as the "fourth trimester" (Which doesn't really make sense, grammatically). We'll often use the "Sleep Sheep" as she sleeps to create white noise. Here's a swaddled Hattie with her friend the sheep!

Rumpus is also acting a little funny. He's dealing with a lot of change, with a new Hamkauf and a house in disarray. We're not sure if he's protective of Hattie, or resents her for getting so much of our attention. Either way, he's been banished from the people bed for the time being.

Rumpus: Full of Love or Bitterness?

Oh, she's waking up! Gotta go!

Hattie's Birth Story

2011-06-10T12:38:00.000-07:00

At our last checkup, the baby was close to ten days overdue and the doctor felt it would be safest to “encourage” the baby to come out with a little modern medicine. We were a little bummed, because we imagined a moment where we’re cooking dinner together and Brynn says “Oh my God…I think it’s happening!" And then we hang out at home doing fancy breathing and body contortions and singing along to Broadway hits with our doula (who lives right down the street) until it was time to go to the hospital.

We got up early on Sunday, and it felt like we were getting ready to catch an early flight, checking the house and making sure we had everything. Brynn even said “we’ve got to get to the airport…” several times. We had grandparents here to watch Rumpus, and we left the house as a duo for the last time.

Our room at the hospital was nice, with a Jacuzzi and big windows with a view of Kinnick Stadium. We saw the rising sun reflected against the bleachers. No wonder so many kids in Iowa City are named “Kinnick!” We checked in, walked around, watched a little bit of “Slings and Arrows” (The best thing to come out of Canada since that round bacon that goes so well with Pineapple on pizza). It didn’t end up taking much intervention at all to get the baby moving. She must have been about ready for action, because in the early afternoon, it hit Brynn like a ton of bricks. There was no question. “Something is happening…” Brynn said. We were prepared for this moment. I turned on Les Miz. Surely the inspiring story of Jean val Jean and that plucky Cosette would see us through this painful journey.

“Do you hear the people sing? Singing the song of angry men! It is a music of a people who will not be slaves again!” I mean, I was sure that by the time there was a castle in a cloud, there would be a baby in a blanket.

“Turn it off!” snarled Brynn. I looked into her eyes and she had gone to another place. It was a place of Amazon warriors. She labored standing up, sitting down, on the birth ball, squeezing my hands so that my ring finger dug into the surrounding digits (One of them an innocent “pinkie!”).

When the doula arrived, Brynn was experimenting with a new position, face down on the floor, clenching a blanket in her fists, with her bottom elevated just the tiniest bit off the ground. Monica entered the room and asked Brynn what she needed, and Brynn said simply “Tips and Tricks!”

So Brynn got into the shower, and the doula brought some electric candles, so it was a really pleasant environment. We stayed in there for a long time. I’d brought my swim suit and imagined that I’d be in there, too, but there wasn’t any time for me to change, and besides, I needed my tennies on for traction as I stood outside the shower holding on to Brynn. At one point in the shower brynn growled “Something just happened!” “What?” “I felt a “pop!” And that was her water breaking. In the shower! So we didn’t get the fun of having water suddenly coming out of her and surprising us. Because there was already water everywhere. And maybe it wouldn’t have been that fun. But it was something I’d imagined.

The doula encouraged Brynn to breath, and to look at me, instead of down at the ground or closing her eyes. When I looked into her eyes, it was amazing. It was like looking at Brynn, but also a vastness, like she was in there somewhere, but was drawing on something deep inside the planet. We would count breaths from ten down to zero. I thought I’d shake it up to keep her from going on autopilot. Sometimes I’d say “This one’s a twelve!” when it started, and then we’d count down from twelve. Or seven, or 15. I’d just make up numbers. If we got to zero before the contraction was over, we’d just start back at 4 or 5 and count down. I was just shaking things up to keep her distracted.

My analogy for this part of the experience is like a big powerful river that is dammed up. Nature naturally erodes this dam, and more and more water would flow through slowly over time. I think the drug they used was like a “dam dissolver,” so that when the rush came, it wasn’t so gradual, it was intense and sudden. I don’t mean Brynn’s water breaking, although that seems like the obvious connection. I mean the onset of and consequent labor. It just came on very sudden and strong without leaving her so much time to catch her breath.

So while she was in the shower, Brynn decided that she wanted some pain medication. Later we realized that nobody at the hospital offered her any pain medication, even during her moaning and contortions. We appreciated this, because this was in our birth plan, and they had a copy of it scanned into her chart, and a hard copy in the room, and they did a great job of respecting our wishes for minimal interventions and deferring to Brynn for pain medication. But after Brynn decided she wanted some pain relief, it still took about 45 minutes to get out of the shower, get dressed, etc. (see coffee-making analogy above).

By this time it was late afternoon, and the sun was now sinking over Kinnick Stadium. Brynn could finally talk and think and focus in a different way. She’d been dealing with intense contractions most of the afternoon, and she’d gone from 5 to 10 centimeters in that last hour, so she could officially start “pushing.” Instead, the dr. had her “labor down” so that her uterus could continue to do some of the work before the pushing began. It was also a nice break. Brynn’s and my parents came in for a little visit, and the crescent moon was setting over Kinnick.

One reason we were bummed to go in on Sunday was because Brynn’s regular Dr., who she really liked, wasn’t on that day. Dr. AHF, as we call her, had been on all day Friday, and on call 24 hours up until Sunday morning. However, we learned that she’d requested to be paged when Brynn was close so that she could deliver the baby. It was a boost to our spirits when she showed up, just prior to pushing. She’d been making dinner when she got the page, thinking it would be a while. We were so happy to see her arrive, and it gave us a burst of energy for the pushing.

The Pushing started at around 9PM, and I again got to be the official “counter” (although this time I did not vary the starting numbers, as there were medical staff overseeing my work. Brynn would feel a contraction starting, then she’d inhale and curl up a I counted to ten. Two or three more sets of 10, then a little break until the next contraction.

It was great to see the team working together, and they all did such a great job. The baby’s head would peep for about an hour, sinking back in each time. Which is good, because the slow squeezing as the baby comes out is good for her. When the head came out, it looked like a claymation creature. And I thought it would be about the size of a little doll. But the baby just kept coming out. She was pink and wriggly right off the bat. I got to cut the cord. We’d talked in our birth class about letting the cord “pulse” before cutting so that the baby gets that last jolt of nutrition, but it all happened so fast, I didn’t even think about saying “Hold it! I’ll be cutting the cord after 30 more seconds of blood pulsation! Everybody wait for my go.”

They cleaned the baby up for a few minutes, because she’d had her first BM in the womb, which sometimes happens with past-due babies. Then the put the naked baby on Brynn’s chest and they had a chance to bond. It was an unforgettable day.

Our parents came in and we told them her name. Of course they loved it. (who knows if they would have said that before it was “official.” I’m glad we kept the name a secret, even thought we’d settled on it months ago. We just never came across one we liked more.) Brynn’s father is Harry, and Hattie is a form of Harry (but we didn’t like “Harriet.” My mom is Dorothy, and she goes by Dottie sometimes, so it was a nice combination of those two names. West is the surname of Brynn’s great aunt with whom she was very close (and she was once a Ziegfield Follies dancer!). She passed away not long ago, and West is a tribute to her.

And that’s the story of how Hattie West entered this world!

The university hospital staff and facilities were fantastic. We stayed for two nights in a room that felt like a fancy hotel. People would come in and check on Brynn and the baby, and we could older room service meals by picking up the phone, or take a Jacuzzi. Different people would come through, like the lactation consultant, who had several long sessions with Brynn about Breastfeeding. It was like an in-house birth class. We didn’t get much sleep (nor have we since), but it was great to know that we could ask questions at any time.

We’re back home now, and the days are flying by. Brynn’s parents are still in town, which has been so helpful. We’re enjoying getting to know this little girl. Rumpus is accepting her into his “pack,” although he would really like to get his jaws on that furry little “Sleep Sheep” of hers…

Hattie West Picture Patrol

2011-06-08T21:10:00.000-07:00

Oooh! Things get BUSY after a baby comes out of a person!

I want to share our birth story soon, but in the meantime, here are some pictures of our Hattie and our first few days together!

Hattie less than an hour old

Hattie getting checked out by the "Peeds"

Hattie at home. Eyes open after a bracing bath

Hattie blessing reverent parishioners

Hattie in hat

The Family's first walk outside together

Swaddled dots in a sea of blue.

Hattie West Kaufmann

2011-06-05T22:38:00.000-07:00

Born 10:46 pm 6/5/11

6 lbs 10 oz

21 inches long

At the Hospital!

2011-06-05T09:37:00.000-07:00

Things are happening! We are at the hospital.

Brynn has her mix of songs that some friends suggested to keep her grooving. She said to me "This would be a great day for the baby to be born, because Linda Jo and a bunch of people from Seattle are involved with "Race for the Cure" right now." And truly, one minute later the phone rang and it was Linda Jo! We like all the doctors and nurses that we've met so far, although the shift is just changing and we're soon to meet Hansen, Shepard and Skopec (the last one sound a bit too much like a medical instrument for my taste- "I'm dr. Skopec, and this little device [pulls out metal device that looks like a cross between an eyelash curler and a can opener] is named after me. It's my, how you say...'calling card.' hahaha."). I'm sure they'll all be nice. Connie, our main nurse, is a kick. She gives us the dish on everybody. She likes that we're theatre people, being a former thespian herself. She told us about her wedding, where she dressed up like Jessica Rabbit and walked down the aisle through a smoky haze.

Seeing the baby will be nice, but in the mean time, our birthing room has a great view of Kinnick Stadium. Home of the "Iowa Hawkeyes" for all you out-of-towners! Would that it were an October game day!

Sun rising over beautiful Kinnick Stadium

Sunset on the Back Porch

2011-06-04T20:36:00.000-07:00

Brynn talks to her brother (soon-to-be-uncle) Will

We All Scream

2011-06-04T07:17:00.000-07:00

...for Ice Cream! So Harry, Vicky, Brynn and I went to Iowa City's famous "Dane's Dairy" last night.

All is well. I started this blog as a way to chronicle and share our journey. I've enjoyed writing and keeping this special time from becoming a blur to us. I also wanted Brynn to have time to take care of herself, knowing that people have a place to check in and she doesn't have to give constant updates. I still imagine that this will all end with a baby, but I worry that I've created a sense of "this should have happened by now!" and "how can you keep us in suspense!?" that I didn't intend. I don't mind keeping people waiting, but I don't want the sense of "building" in my posts to feel like pressure for Brynn to satisfy some sort of narrative arc.

Brynn is doing great. She's sleeping, and when she wakes up we plan to head off on our saturday ritual of ping-pong, swimming, and the farmer's market, where we'll get fresh vegetables, cheese from Acoustic Farms, an Amish-made strawberry-rhubarb pie, and have apple cider donuts. I won't even say "for the last time without a baby."

Waiting Brings Back Bad Habits

2011-06-02T22:43:00.000-07:00

I was looking for Brynn and had a hunch where I could find her...

Well, I got her out of there, for sure! I've told her a thousand times! "Baby comes out before drinky goes in!" My goodness!

Today Brynn worked at Willowwind, got a shiatsu massage, and tonight, her parents arrived in Iowa City from San Francisco. It's great to have them here. Harry and I watched the Mavericks come-from-behind victory.

We feel ready for the baby now. To come. Out.

There Will Be Plenty of Paper Towels

2011-06-01T21:55:00.000-07:00

All went well at the Dr. today. It's always nice to hear the baby's heartbeat. There may be a few more days of Hamkauf Babywatch 2011.
It seems the baby is smart and knows not to come out before...
-Willowwind school (where Brynn works) finishes classes (tomorrow)
-Harry and Vicky Hambly arrive (tomorrow)
-We get the Volkswagen's 80,000 service and then wipe down all the interior surfaces, throw away cups/gas receipts/red Dairy Queen spoons and clean out old maps in the door cubbies, because who uses paper maps anymore? (we did that tonight)

So really the baby will probably wait until tomorrow afternoon, or decide to let me watch game two of the NBA finals tomorrow night (I'm encouraging the baby to root FOR the Mavericks rather than AGAINST LeBron James).

Also the baby wants to be sure that there will be plenty of paper towels waiting for her when she exits the womb and enters this world. And after today I can honestly tell her, yes, baby Hamkauf, there will be plenty of paper towels waiting for you when you enter this world. At a magical place called Hy-Vee. Above the refrigerated cheese! In aisle 17! Join us and be absorbed by this sweet life!

(note that that is Brynn's FAVORITE maternity shirt. At this point, most of them allow a child or quite short person to see some belly skin if they were to look up at her. But not this one. It covers down and out, then down and back!)

June Baby

2011-05-31T21:15:00.000-07:00

Unless Brynn gives sudden birth in the next hour, our baby will have a June birthday. I drove to beloit yesterday for a meeting, and I was nervous I would miss the birth. On my way home, the "check engine" light came on, and I thought "oh no! I'll be stranded in Illinois and miss the birth!" But I made it back.

So now we're a few days past due. People ask "when are you due" when they see Brynn. And then she tells them that the due date was on Friday, and they always have some comment. "I bet you can't wait!" or a tip to spur labor, or a follow up question of "how long will they let you go?" So we're feeling and doing well, but in an odd place of being "over-due," like we've missed a deadline. Brynn heard about a philosophy where due dates weren't identified. People had a window of time, but it wasn't about a specific date. Or that people might ask "In what season will your baby be born?" or "What your window?" I'd predicted June 1st, so we'll see. Brynn's been going on lots of walks the past few days, and getting plenty of rest.

Tomorrow we have a Dr. appointment.

I'll end with a few "Gestation Flashbacks"

Jan 17
We met with Monica Brasille yesterday and had a great visit and decided that we wanted to have her as our doula.

Jan 26

We saw the baby moving from the outside of the belly tonight!

March 15

The other day Brynn felt the baby have the hiccups! We also went to Target to look for baby stuff. It was kind of overwhelming. There's so much baby crap. When it was time to close, a woman came up and said “Can I help you?” instead of telling us that Target was closing. Then she did the same thing a few minutes later. It was weird. I asked her why she didn't just say that Target was closing and she said "we don't do that anymore." It was really passive aggressive.

No Labor Day

2011-05-30T21:23:00.001-07:00

We took a walk and went to s memorial day cook out. But no baby

2 Days Post-Due

2011-05-29T07:05:00.000-07:00

Hambly is not one to slow down. Last night we experienced the Hip-Hop/Blue-Eyed-Soul stylings of JTrey at the Yacht Club in Iowa City. It was a family affair, with Jeremy on the mic and Hal on the drums. Brynn quickly learned that with a little "liquid courage," strangers don't hesitate to touch a pregnant belly. "Oh my GOD! You're PREGNANT! When is it DUE? Do you know what you're HAVING? Do you have any NAMES picked out?" These aren't so different from the questions of sober strangers, but so much more annoying when the asker is swaying, slurring and looking at the pregnant specimen as if SHE were the freak. I'm sure Brynn wanted to respond "We haven't shared our name ideas with family and close friends but we'd love to confide in a random drunken stranger!" Despite a few tummy touches, the band was great and we had a fun night out on the town. We may not have too many more chances before the baby. And I bet Brynn's popping and locking helped to get the baby moving.

Picture of Brynn with Baby

2011-05-28T11:49:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, this is not OUR baby. It's from a Hambly Christmas party a few years ago, and the baby is our nephew Niko who was about 7 weeks old. This is the baby from "Date of Birth" video that we watched a few days ago. You can see a short section of the play here.
Watching it turned out to be very instructive, seeing how the midwives and nurses came and went as shifts ended, and the subtle mounting pressure to induce as time went on.

We had a great morning with ping pong (Brynn still beats me! Even though I try to take advantage of her limited lateral movement by forcing her to move right and left. We split a pair today, but it does cause me concern for after the baby is born. Certainly there will be a window of time when she is recovering from the birth where I figure she'll be at even more of a disadvantage than she is now, 40 weeks pregnant. But my clear advantage there will be short lived, and each victory might feel somewhat hallow. Another fear is that the experience she is getting now will end up improving her non-pregnant game [not unlike training a horse on sand, or a baseball player swinging two bats], but time will tell), swimming and then to the farmers market.

Gestation Flashback:

Jan 15, 2011

Today we went to the "Mindful Birthing Summit" at the public library. An intense chiropractor impressed us with his "Prezi" presentation. I asked about Breech and he helped me understand that it only becomes an issue in the final weeks of pregnancy. Chiropractors can fix it, though! His session ended, then suddenly he says “any of you guys ever seen a C-section?” and suddenly there was one in front of us on the giant video screen. It was intense, with no warning. Yikes! Then suddenly 3 of his student chiropractic wanna-bes sitting near us start talking our ears off about how when the smoke alarm goes off you don’t just take the batteries out! You put out the fire! That's what chiropractors do!

Then Brynn stayed for a session about how to use a sling presented by a quiet asian woman while I went to a birth partner session. There’s always some kid in the arms of the speaker, pounding on the table at these things. Then there was a doula panel that was pretty helpful. At the end of the day, Brynn was feeling a little overwhelmed by it all (dewy eyes, looking like she was about to implode), so we decided we wouldn’t stay for the movie about birth images in the media. As we were getting ready to leave, a fellow grad-student shows up, suddenly sitting right next to us. “Oh, my gosh! What are YOU doing here?” she said (most people still don't know about the baby). I thought Brynn was going to lose it! But, we were both glad we went. What I got out of the workshop was that we should stick with James’ massage, exercise regularly, get a doula. Also, be sure not to go to the hospital too early. As soon as you arrive, you're on the clock. And then they start getting "itchy"... So labor at home, baby!

Due Date

2011-05-27T21:25:00.000-07:00

Brynn went to work at willowwind like any other day. We went out to eat tonight to celebrate making it to the due date and had perhaps the saltiest meal we've ever ingested. That baby is swimming in brine. She's going to come out pickled. We'll name her Pickle-ina. The robin chicks did leave the nest today. So I think we're close. I also pumped up this big rubber ball that people say is great to sit on with a baby. So we're READY. Tomorrow is our Saturday ritual of ping pong, swimming and the farmers market.

Brynn and John engage in the ancient practice of "salting the womb."

More Baby Dreams

2011-05-26T18:32:00.000-07:00

Last night at 2:30 AM I jotted down the following notes from a dream I was having:

The Hospital called and said the baby was ready. I was supposed to go pick it up. I told the dr. I'd I’d meet him on ___ st. to pick up the baby. I decided to go up further to where street ended, so there'd be less traffic. I parked near some neat houses up by a lake. I knew some college students who lived across the water. Saw corduroy pants I recognized. Waiting and waiting for baby to arrive. Maybe should have stayed on that st. Brynn joined me (she didn't have the baby, either). We decided to drive. Trying to go slow, over bridge around corners, riding the brakes but couldn’t stop. Spinning, almost crashing, other traffic seemed to be able to drive just fine. Stopped the car. Now we're in a room. Dr. came (he had a cigarette in his mouth and said “Shouldn’t smoke these things") He handed off the baby to us. It was healthy, but stitched up all over, like a softball. “Thanks” I said. Rumpus was around. “We go out of our way for deliveries on Mondays.” The Dr. said. [end of dream]

So maybe the baby will be born on Monday! We are now less than four hours from the due date. I don't think the baby will be born today. Maybe tomorrow. If so, we shall name her "Thyme Lee."

Brynn got a shiatsu massage. We saw the Willowwind school play. We put the car seat in the car tonight. So we're READY.

And now, a very special "Gestation Flashback."

Jan 3, 2011

We arrived home from our California trip yesterday and stayed overnight in Ames. We got up early 8AM (6AM CA time) and had breakfast with Dad, Mom and Dennis. Brynn and I drove to Trader Joes in Des Moines. We divided and conquered, starting at opposite sides of the store and meeting in the middle, spending over $200 in the process. A nice ride to Iowa City. It was so good to be home. We were a little nervous for the Ultrasound. All went great, Brynn and the baby healthy and on track. Lots of pictures. Brynn had gained weight and was up to 135 lbs. It was an intense moment when they told us the gender. Our hearts were beating so fast... And we learned...The alligator is a GIRL! We thought we might not tell anybody, but we decided that it would be too hard to keep it a secret. We told Vicky, Harry, Mom and Dad that night. We were so excited. We went to Banditos for dinner to celebrate and to have a back-from-vacation mail opening party.

Introducing Teddy Ruxpin Hambly Kaufmann

2011-05-25T17:16:00.000-07:00

Brynn had a dream last night that the baby was born, but it had to live inside an exoskeleton that looked like Teddy Ruxpin http://images.businessweek.com/ss/06/09/popular_toys/source/15.htm. This was also true of all babies born. She couldn't see what the baby looked like. After the baby had been home for a few days, Brynn figured out the code to get the casing off. She could finally see what the baby looked like (my family, she said, was very impressed that she could get the covering off). But the baby had been really hot inside the shell, and was sweating and unhappy (in spite of Teddy's cheerful proclamations!).

When she told me the dream, I thought that it was inspired by rumpus, who looks a bit like TR. In fact, Rumpus got scared by the lightning last night. He left his Rumpie bed and scratched at the people bed until we let him up.

Rumpus in People Bed in his Snowflake PJs

But alas, no real baby born today. I put batteries in a gift we were given called "Itzbeen" that tracks how long "it's been" since the last diaper change, feeding, nap, etc. So we're READY. I use the baby to justify all sorts of things. I got some gum at the store, telling myself "I'll need some gum to chew when Brynn's in labor!" Tonight we plan to watch a video of "Date of Birth," a play I developed taken verbatim from recordings I made when my sister had her baby.

There Was Not a Baby Born Today

2011-05-24T21:27:00.000-07:00

There weren't really any strong labor pains. Three days until due date. Babies are born on due dates. (if this due date comes and goes, I'll be like that pastor who predicted the apocalypse, and then it passed. Readers will think we're just stringing them along...)

Perhaps a few "Gestation Flashbacks" to keep our readers from switching to flashier, celebrity-gossip blogs...

Dec. 15, 2010

Brynn’s had a few barfs lately. She threw up Monday Night, and then again Tuesday Morning. I was sad Monday because she lost all that good meat! Rumpy is just playing non-stop fetch! Took a picture today. Brynn’s weight: 132.6 “That’s the most I’ve ever weighed.”

Dec. 18, 2010

Brynn felt the baby move for the first time today. She said it felt like gas. She’s had a few vomits lately. She thinks it might be the trader joes vitamins

Dec. 19, 2010

I opened a Christmas present from Brynn. It was "The Alligator Alphabet." We call the baby an alligator, because that's what it looks like in the ultrasound. Not human yet. The alligator alphabet was the first book we read out loud to the little alligator!

Bath, Bed and Beyond

2011-05-23T19:54:00.000-07:00

Brynn had some Braxton Hicks contractions today, and all went well at the Dr.'s office, but it looks like it's still going to be a few days. Brynn took a warm bath and is getting to bed early tonight.

Here's today's "Gestation Flashback"

Entry from Dec. 7, 2010

Elizabeth Edwards died today, and Obama and the republicans came to a deal on tax cuts. Brynn got an award and $500 for being awesome and contributing to her field. I also got a scale so we could weigh Rumpus and Brynn (together and/or separately). It’s meat week, so I hope Brynn gains some weight. Yesterday I made roasted vegetables and steak salad (with the steak done on the grill, despite the cold!) Brynn told me about her Dr. appointment, which went well. I was so happy. She was nervous because it took Dr. AHF a minute to find the heartbeat, but she did. I think it was at 154. Brynn had to get lots of blood drawn. She also got a flu shot. Brynn asked about Dr. vs. Midwife, and decided she wanted to go with Dr. AHF, and Dr. AHF would be the one to deliver the baby if at all possible for her. We decided to have a consultation with Monica about Doula ideas.

Oh, here is a list of recent barfs based on text messages (she lets me know each time it happens)… Let’s see... Oct. 26 at 11:52 AM, Oct. 29 at 12:41 PM, Nov. 2 at 11:38 AM, Nov. 8 at 12:33 PM, Dec. 1 at 11:02 AM.

Loosening Up

2011-05-23T10:01:00.000-07:00

So last night I said, "Brynn, tomorrow we'll be four days away from the due date. I wonder what I'd get if I google 'four days until due date.'" So I googled that phrase, and I came across this inspiring thread from the folks at "Baby and Bump." (careful readers will find the key phrase within the thread!)

I have a cold, could labor be near? Also would the baby catch it? :(

I read somewhere that a cold can mean labor is near, is that really true? Has it happend to anyone before? Also I'm worried if she does come while I have this cold that she may catch it

Also I read loose bowels can mean labor is near, and I've had alot of those after being constipated my entire pregnancy!

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I had a cold for two weeks and only just rid off it and no sign of baby yet!( well apart from losing my plug and a few twinges no sign of her)

I have had loose bowels for a few days. With my first I had loose bowels all day before I had her that evening so I was getting excited when it started the other day but as I wrote still sign no of her...yet. getting impatient now and I still have four days until due date!

Gem x

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I've had a cold and it's an on-going pain but thankfully as of yet no bambino also my bowels have become alot looser but I think it depends on where baby is laying for me.

End Thread Quote

Now we are truly ready for the joys of birthing!

We have a dr. appt. later today so I'll try to give another update later.

Basement Safety

2011-05-22T14:20:00.000-07:00

We're down in the basement, waiting until the tornado warning is over.

I was outside in the sun, watching the birds in the nest, and the sky turned very dark. Then the sirens started, so we all came to the basement. I don't know if Rumpus has ever been down here. We had a nice Skype visit with James and Rebecca. James is a friend from college, and they are due with a baby less than 2 weeks after ours. James and I told each other about our baby news during the same phone call. It's been so great to have an ongoing check in as a couple.

Brynn and I went to brunch at Banditos. Each time we go out to eat we're aware that it might be our last time as a duo for a while. During brunch, we discussed what to do with Rumpus when we head to the hospital.

Gestation Flashback: Nov. 1st, 2010
"Brynn and I canvassed the neighborhood for Democrats yesterday. I'm not too optimistic about the election, though. We had a few days when we got nervous, because Brynn didn’t throw up, and she was having low-back pain. However, she’s been queasy regularly the past few days, with even a few barfs, so we’re back on track. We’re now halfway through week 10…We’re into November. Our next “milestone” is this coming Monday, November 8. There’s a dr. appt. and it will be the start of week 11. We’ve been watching TV together (Californication, Bored to Death, finishing Veronica a few days back…) and getting good night’s sleeps. I’ve been in charge of dinner, usually. Last night we had rotisserie chicken. Mac and Cheese before that."

A couple of pictures from that time: Our Halloween costumes, and a Whistle-Stop campaign Event. That's then-governor Chet Culver standing on the right on the train. Both days, Brynn was pregnant, but at the time we were telling neither trick-or-treaters nor then-governor Chet Culver!

Baby Not Taken by Apocalypse

2011-05-21T21:09:00.000-07:00

I got worried that since our unborn babe is without sin, she would be taken by the apocalypse at 6PM today, but Brynn is still pregnant. I was relieved. Then I thought "What if this means our baby has already sinned...in utero!" What could she have done!? Kicked..not to "stretch" but just to...cause pain? Cursed the placenta? And if she's already sinning within, what happens when she's exposed to her pagan parents?

Well, we had our Saturday ritual of playing ping-pong and swimming at the community center, then walking to the farmers market. We also saw "Brides Maids." No birth, however. If the baby had been born, I'd have opened the post with that information.

Today's "Gestation Flashback" is the screen shot of when we told Brynn's parents that she was pregnant over a video chat, on Nov. 20th 2010. Actually, Brynn had told her mother a bit earlier, but this the first time her dad heard the news. You can see us up in the corner of the screen.

Lastly, I'd mentioned the birds that are nesting in our yard, and I got up on a ladder and took this picture today. The 4 chicks are resting with their beaks up.

Naming Criteria

2011-05-20T08:09:00.000-07:00

Our friends Martin and Carly live around the block, but right behind us through the alley. When I was coming back from Martin's birthday party a few weeks ago, I came through the alley and in through our garage. When I opened the small door that leads to our back yard, I was startled by a loud and sudden flapping of wings right by my head. A bird had built a nest in the motion sensor light above the door, and opening the door hit some of the twigs hanging down. I thought "that's a crappy place for a nest. We won't be able to use the garage." and started pulling it down. It was late, so I didn't finish the job. In the morning, I saw that I could just cut the strands hanging down, and we could still open the door. I also realized that the nest was not nascent, but must have been constructed when we'd been out of town the weekend prior. And it turns out that there were eggs in the nest. And now we sit on the back porch and watch with binoculars as the mother feeds the four upward straining, wide-beaked heads. We now have an affinity with that mother bird, whose home I almost ravaged. I suggested the name "Robin" for our daughter. We like watching the baby birds, and the timing is nice, but neither of us really like that name. Maybe, whatever her "real" name, she could have the nickname "Birdie."

We also can't name her "Beatrice," even though we like that name, because that's Martin and Carly's daughter's name. Nor "Carly," another nice name. Because that's Carly's actual name. So we can't name her names like that, too closely connected to people we know. And people say "You should name her whatever name you want," but it just doesn't feel right, and you can't have a name that makes you feel funny in your tummy when you think it/say it. Even if you like that name. We also don't want names that are too popular, or names that, when one looks at it, it's not clear how to say it. "Sonia" is a good example of that. Is it pronounced "Sahn-ya" or "Sown-ya" I always think to myself. I know some very nice Sonias, but I always hesitate before saying their names, and often find a way around doing so. I have memories of being wrong, being corrected, and feeling I've insulted Sonone. I'm working with a nice gal named "Adriana" right now. But I have to always make sure I say "Adri-ah-na" instead of "Adri-ann-na." So no names like that. Who wants to ask somebody on a date somebody if you don't even know how to say their name? Teachers unconsciously stop calling on students with difficult to pronounce names. People with such names seldom seek, nor are elected to public office.

We don't want a name that, when it's spoken, might be confused with another name. We like the name "Ada," for instance. And it is actually under consideration. My grandmother was named "Ada Lewellyn" before her parents allowed her, at age five, to legally change her own name to "Gertrude Ernestine." But "Ava" is one of the most popular baby names right now. And we don't want people saying "Oh, Hi Ava!" and she has to say "It's ADA. With a D!" "Oh, I'm sorry." "That's okay. Nobody gets it right. It leaves me consistently sad."

We do want a name that feels like it's been around, not a new, or made-up name. It has to sound right with the middle last name (we're going with "Kaufmann" for that). I liked the name "Lark" (I really did), but Lark Kaufmann didn't sound right. You'd have to take a pause after the first K, and that's not a realistic expectation for the average potential friend/acquaintance of our child. It would be reduced to a single, rushed "K" in the middle. The syllables also have to be right. It usually works to have a one syllable first and a two syllable middle, or vice versa. I like names that sound like the could be the name of a spunky female news reporter from a black and white movie. So that's how I test potential names. "I'm Dixie Kaufmann from the Tribune, and I wanna know why you're running around with seedy creeps like Mort Jenkins and his ilk."

James, the talkative Shiatsu massage therapist, said that Brynn was exceptionally healthy for somebody one week away from her due date. And we are exactly one week from the due date. Today starts week 39, and the due date is next Friday, May 27.

"Gestation Flashback"

Although I just started this public blog yesterday, I have been keeping a journal to remember this time, and I will share selected entries as an ongoing feature of this blog. A feature we call "Gestation Flashback."

October 30, 2010

Today Kevin A. came over and we watched the Hawkeye’s demolish #5 Michigan St. Then Brynn and I had a Veronica Mars marathon. Only 2 episodes left before we find out who the killer is!

We entered week 10 of the pregnancy. According to Brynn’s online chart, it went from an Olive to a Prune inside of her. No barfing today, I don’t think. So far we've only told a couple of people. I admit I’m excited to tell my parents and close friends.

· For a while Brynn was nervous every time she went to the bathroom, afraid that she’d discover bleeding or spotting and that would be it. Brynn yearned to have morning sickness, so it would be a positive sign. One day she felt queasy and we both got excited. She had a few trips to the toilet before her first real barf. It’s funny, because as she was barfing I was smiling and laughing a little, because it was what she’d wanted and it was a good sign. She barfed outside of Riverside theatre after a Bingo rehearsal.

· Since then she’s been a pretty regular barfer at home and a few times at Willowwind, but nobody’s seen her. Finding excuses not to drink around friends has been a challenge. For a while she could say she was sick. And last weekend at Saloon she went to the bar and snuck an order for a non-alcoholic drink. The bartender called a “White Sangria.” Dr. Stegman arranged a special ultrasound at around week 7. We were amazed to see the little thing, “like a little gummy bear” the nurse said. They also measured the heartbeat, 174 beats per minute. It was hard to believe.

In the Window.

2011-05-19T15:32:00.000-07:00

Welcome to your home for the latest about pregnancy and birth as it relates to our daughter in waiting. We'll try to keep you updated, as this is an exciting time. We are in "the window," where the baby could decide to send some hormones to Brynn and ask her politely to make way. The official due date is May 27th. Leave your own arrival date guesses in the comments section and you could win an official autographed adult-sized onesie. My guess is June 1st, Brynn's hoping for May 21st, which many are calling "Judgement Day." If the child is born on that day, we might name her "Judgement," "Messiah" (or "Miss Siyah," to be clever and avoid having her in a classroom someday with a bunch of other "Messiah's." We've learned nothing if not that common names must have innovative spellings! [Right, Klowee?]), or simply "The Chosen" (Chozee for short). If she'd been born on May 17th (the full moon), I liked the name "Luna" (I really did), but she wasn't born that day. If we wanted to go with the moon theme, we could still name her "Wane" or "Crescent," but I don't think Brynn would go for that.

As I write this Brynn is getting a shiatsu massage. This may spur labor, as this guy works on the baby too, manipulating it around like a beanie baby inside a balloon full of jello. Today in the mail we got a stroller and a video baby monitor (Thanks, Grants!!). We assembled the stroller and put Rumpus in it and wheeled around, practicing.

I'll end this post by getting you up to speed with some pictures "from the vault." This baby became a potential human around Labor Day (which is also the day she'll be born!), and here are a few pictures of us, ignorant that there were the tiny seeds of person inside of Brynn at the time.

I was in Chicago at a Cubs game with my friend Matt when all this was happening.

Brynn was at our friends Angie and Michael's wedding in beautiful Washington State. Enjoying plenty of wine and partying with college friends.

We both got back to Iowa City and put on our Hawkeye gear.

But we still had no idea. See, because the timing didn't seem so ideal, what with us being across the country from each other during when most biological clocks would mark as "the window."

Even Rumpus, asleep in his Rumpie Bed had no idea, although some dogs intuit health changes and can even sniff out fire arms or illegal drugs!

But Brynn did get pregnant. Almost 9 months ago. And that's where we are now. A case of pregnant mother and inside-the-belly baby. Two statuses that cannot continue for much longer.

Be the first to find out the latest. Tune in right here. We'll keep you updated with all the (water) breaking news.