9 Months of Hattie

I am sitting at North Point Wellness Center in Roscoe, Illinois.  Brynn is a member here, ostensibly (I'd  thought there was a "B" in that word!  like "obstinate" but "sensible," maybe.  But no! Computer say "no!") to exercise, but really it's because they offer child care.  And I come and sit in the lobby and do work while Hattie wears a bar-coded name tag on her back and pushes a chair around a playroom full of toys.  That's a new thing she likes to do: stand up and push a chair around.  That's what she asked to do on her 9 month birthday.

Since her 8 month birthday, she's been standing up more, not really on her own, but against walls, against us, against the world!  She hates sitting down: in the tub, the car seat, in her high chair.  Wants to stand up.  We also think she has a 3rd tooth on the way, this one on the top floor.  A stalactite.  She has had the serious poops lately.  But I won't go into that.  I think 1 and 2 are starting to differentiate again, thank god.

Hattie's Godmother Allie came for a visit in February and showered her with love and treats.  She is welcome anytime!  My 2nd show at Beloit "Pretty Theft" opened and closed, and now we're on Spring Break.  I look forward to having more time with Brynn and Hattie.  But next week Brynn will be leading an education field trip in Chicago with her former adviser at UI, so she will be away from Hattie for the first time for more than a few hours.  My mom and Stepdad will be coming to help me out, which is great.  Oh, and Wednesday is Brynn's birthday, so we're getting a sitter and going to Abreo in Rockford (we've never been, but we hear it's fancy for these parts!) www.abreorockford.com

I think when I last wrote, we were starting the sleep training.  It's actually gone pretty well.  Hattie goes to be much more easily, she stays in her crib, and she usually just wakes up once in the night.  Well, she has several little wake-ups, where she gets herself back to sleep, but usually just one big one where we intervene and feed or bounce her.

Speaking of bouncing, it's picture time!

 She's a pretty good-natured, kid.

 But if she were 50 feet tall, and pulled up her leg-warmers, she'd be SCAWY!

 Out at the park with Allie

 Aggressive-trouble-grin

 Bouncing on the Cow!

 Her first words were "Everything you see here--even the purple corduroy mythical horse thing--

this shit's mine."

Note: After "ostensibly" and "stalactite," "corduroy" is the 3rd word I'd have no idea how to spell without the stupid computer.

 If she were a boy this would be like we'd caught her peeing against the wall.  

But she's a girl and wearing a diaper anyway.

 She's a starman waiting in the sky. She'd like to come and meet us,

But she thinks he'd blow our minds!

 Chico Loco!  Hattie's bringing parachute pants bil-zack!

 Daddy took Hattie to a new breakfast place so Brynn could sleep in.  

Do you think the old lady table over there thinks we're adorable?

Can the server focus on her coffee refills?

Yes and No!

(Well, I can't seem to get my cursor between these two pictures, so I'll treat them like an intentional sequence...)

Hattie finished all of Rumpie's dog food... And proceeded to change her own diaper!

Maybe THAT'S why she's been having GI trubs! 

No more kibbles, Little Miss Nibbles! 

And happy 9 months! Flibbles!  Flibbles!

8 Months of Hattie!

8 months ago Hattie Squeezed out of her mother.  And we're going to celebrate tonight by trying a "sleep training" regimen that will likely make this one of the most unpleasant nights of her life.  And quite possibly ours.  Rather than focus on the likelihood of long-lasting emotional scars, let's take a look at some of the good times of the last few weeks!  And when I say "take a look," I mean "take a look"... at pictures!

All the creatures greet daddy at the gates!

 Hattie's first Swing Session

 Hattie is literally thinking "I'll just peek at you from behind this chair!"

Brynn is dressed for the cold, but a close examination of the photo reveals a mysterious floating goblin in the right side of the image.  Occultists have had a field day with this one, many challenging our assertion that THERE WAS NO ONE ELSE IN THE HOME WHEN THE PICTURE WAS TAKEN!

 Bundled for Chicago Snow

 This could be a PSA for Child Proofing your home.

So we moved the table out of the dining room and gated it off.

 And added a special padded floor

And now she plays there!

But we still borrowed one of those big plastic machine things so she could be in the kitchen while we're cooking and stay out of trouble.

 We watched the Beloit Buccaneers Basketball team win in overtime yesterday!

 There's no happy like mommy happy.

 Sometimes we just let he play in the bathroom with the door closed for hours on end.  Actually, there is ONE loose tile on the bathroom floor, and she is obsessed with it.  She can be anywhere in the house, and she'll get a bug up her diaper and crawl over to that ONE loose tile, pick it up, and try to put it in her MOUTH.  Yuck! A bathroom tile in her MOUTH!

 This was Hattie's reaction when we told her she'd be "sleep training."

But we're not going to think about that right now.  

Hattie Birthday!

7 Months of Dumpling!

I am at a coffee shop in Beloit, missing Brynn and Hattie, who will return from San Francisco in a few days.  But Hattie has passed the 7 month milestone (this was achieved my mixing mashed prunes into her limited diet), and deserves a picture-filled post.  I left San Francisco early to lead a workshop at Science North in Sudbury, Ontario.  I had a good time in the town famous for nickel-mining and asteroid impact, seeing my only real snow of the holiday season.  Our semester starts back up at Beloit in a few days, and I am putting the final touches on my syllabi and preparing for auditions and rehearsals for "Pretty Theft," which starts up the first week of classes.
   
I had a great time in San Francisco with the Hambly's and Hattie, which I'll chronicle through the Picture Pages!

 Not crawling yet, but able to get where she needs to go, and still has the gumption to look like

a slightly displeased Mafia boss.

 This Mob boss tuckers her parents OUT.

 Hattie at Half Moon Bay.

 Hattie showing off the name tag she got at her free trial Gymboree class.  I thought it was nice, Brynn was underwhelmed, and Hattie was able to hang with the other "level 2" students, particularly outshining "Ian" who seemed to cry at the least bit of clapping, hearing familiar melodies with cleverly branded lyrics (who knew "Gymboree" had the exact same number of syllables and opening "Juh" sound as the holiday favorite "Jingle Bells?!"), and sitting under a waving parachute.  I also realize that I'm not doing Hattie any favors by making goofy faces and squirming playfully when she pulls my hair.  Why, then, don't the other kids like it?  Why don't they jig and amble as does Daddy?  Why is Ian crying again?

 This is the sad result of a diaper changed in the tailgate of a car,
while Hattie clings to and swings about her favorite bunny. And her stuffed rabbit.

 Hattie got a part time job at the front desk of an accountant's office.  She wore business casual and directed people to eat a magazine while they wait.

Actually, Hattie is in what I called "the machine" that Vicky found for us (a GREAT thing that we'll have to get when they return to Beloit).  It's like a workstation with gizmos on all sides.  When I called it "The Machine," Brynn assumed I was referencing the hugging machine that Temple Grandin invented to give herself (and later livestock) a sense of security.  That wasn't my intention, and I worried why Brynn would make this connection.

Speaking of livestock!  Hattie, Brynn and Vicky went to Riley's Place, where Vicky volunteers.  

I think Hattie's telling this pony about her machine!

Happy New Year to you all. Hattie says she hopes 2012 will finally "put the birth behind her."

Hattie Claus!

It's the holiday time of year!   Hattie is "a little duck" according to Brynn, who is sitting across the counter from me with Hattie on her lap.  Hattie got a B+ from Brynn this morning for her sleep grade, which is pretty good.  In the past week, Hattie has driven to Iowa to spend pre-Christmas with my family,  then got on a plane to San Francisco in time for the Hambly Christmas Eve party.  I assured the man sitting next to us on the plane that Hattie was usually pretty well behaved on planes.  Instead of being relieved, he said, "oh, great.  Way to jinx it."  I said, "I didn't mean to jinx it.  She's just flown before and has done well."
"You just did it again," he said, chuckling, as if he'd "caught me in the act."
"So according to your logic, if I wish you a Merry Christmas, you'll have a crappy Christmas, because I'd have 'jinxed' it, huh?"
"Oh, now..."
"Because I have some sort of 'super power' where if I say something, the opposite thing happens?  Okay, then our beautiful, cherubic daughter is going to wail, vomit and poop nonstop during this flight, and you'll  have a holly jolly Christmas, my dear American Airlines Row-Mate."

But she really was good on the plane, and we're having a great time in California with Brynn's family.  She got her first dolly, which she loves.

She also visited Riley's Place, where she got to pet goats and see horses

She has also been eating banana Mush

Our child loves polka-dots!

Decked out for the Christmas Eve party

Holiday Cheer

An outfit adorned exclusively with sweets we hope she doesn't actually ingest for many years

Hattie rhymes with Dattie!

 Wood Blocks from Uncle Will!

Merry Christmas, to all Hattie's friends!

6 Months of Hattie!

Today is Hattie's 6 month birthday.  It was June 5th that Hattie emerged proudly from a hospital room above Kinnick Stadium in Iowa City.  Now she prepares for the brisk Beloit winter.  She's in a little carrier on me right now, and starting to squirm, so I'll...

Okay, It's later now.  Brynn got home from volunteering at the literacy center and we all ate a special birthday meal that Hattie and I had prepared: Trader Joes crab cakes, roasted vegetables and apple pie.  The pie was "baked in a bag." 

The pie came from the Elegant Farmer.  

Please do now go to the website:

http://www.elegantfarmer.com/

If you click on "Farmer Dan's Messages," you'll hear an inspirational message.

The pies were being sold at Williams Tree Farm, where we had a family outing yesterday, complete with  lots of dogs, reindeer, and Santa. 

And this just in:  Hattie's first tooth.  

Also, she now has a crib, thanks to my Dad and Linda.  

We had a nice Thanksgiving with James, Rebecca and Samuel. 

Now we're just trying to keep things together until Christmas, when we can hand Hattie off to Grandparents, siblings and random salvation army bell-ringers 

and run off to the Muppet Movie.  

Picture time, yo.

Insert cliche dual usage of "crib"joke here.

Whatever you feel about patriarchal representations of monotheism,

this is like an effing Norman Rockwell.

Featuring Rumpus as both the lamb of God 

AND the star of Bethlehem!  

 Warming up after picking out our tree

 I can't abide this gul durn city life.  I'm gonna go outside and russell up some CUTE.

 Rumpus has a breaking point.  And Hattie will find it. 

She believes it is somewhere near his shaggy poodle ear.

 Here Hattie gives the illusion of being able to sit up by herself.  

Left alone, she would continue her right-leaning trajectory.

 Hattie's first words were "I got them Duke boys right where I want them!"

It's so cold we replaced her nose with a funny green mustache!

If eyes could say "Help Me," her eyes would be saying "Help Me."

Since they cannot say such things at such a young age, let us make believe that they are saying

"Until next time, my friends.  Goodest of byes.  I shall miss you.

But seriously.  Help me."